The words of Zerog as recored by Moddop
The humans have this word – hope – which I don’t really understand. I spent some time with one of them recently and we talked about it – very strange.
I had captured her and was bring her back to camp. I’m sure she knew what her fate was going to be – we capture lots of humans for slaves and food – but she was happy. I asked he why she was smiling and she answered me, “Because I have hope.”
“Do you think you will be rescued?” I asked her.
She said, “No,” and just kept smiling.
I didn’t believe her so I took her off the trail and made her sit – I figured we would wait and see if we were being followed. While we waited we talked some more.
“What is this hope?” I asked her.
She thought for a few moments before saying, “It is the knowledge that God will use what ever happens – no mater how evil its intent – for good. It is the knowledge that I am safe in him.”
“Do you see where you are? Do you know where you are going?” I asked her.
She nodded yes.
“And you believe that you are safe?”
She nodded again and then said, “You may hurt me. You may even kill me. But I know that I am safe.”
“What are you safe from if I can hurt you and kill you?”
She lifted her hands up towards the sky and said, “I am safe in the eyes of God.”
I didn’t know what to say. “Safe in the eyes of God.” What kind of God does she worship? The only thing I know is fear. In the eyes of God, the only thing I know is failure. I have not sacrificed enough; I have not worked hard enough; I have not finished the tasks given to me.
I finally asked her, “How can you not tremble in fear before your God? Are you perfect?”
She shook her head no. “I am not perfect. No, from from it. God may be disappointed in me, but he has forgiven me. All he asks is that I try to share his love with others, and even when I fail at that, he still loves me.”
“He loves you,” I said almost hissing in contempt, “How can a God love someone like you?”
“Because his son loves me, and he loves the ones his son loves. Doesn’t your God love you?”
This one who was about to become a slave surly had nerve to ask if God loves me. One could be struck down for thinking so highly of oneself. God is to be feared and obeyed – he has no time to love me – and even if he did have time, how could he love something like me – my own mother can hardly stand me.
I jumped up. “I should kill you for saying such things.” I yelled at her.
But she didn’t flench, she just sat there smiling. When I sat back down she said, “Would killing me make your God look at you with favor? If so, maybe you should kill me.”
I sat there a long time thinking – or trying to think. My mind didn’t know what to make of this woman. She seemed so out of place. She should be crying and begging, but instead she is happy and even suggested that I should kill her. Maybe I should have. I thought about it, but my fear got the better of me.
I reached over and cut the rope that was tied around her neck. She sat there with a puzzled look on her face. “Run away,” I yelled at her. She sat there. I stood up and pulled her to her feet. “If your God loves you so much that you are not afraid of him, perhaps I should be afraid of his wrath if I hurt you.”
She nodded understanding and took a step backwards.
As she started to walk away, I said to her, “Today your God has saved you.”
She looked over her shoulder and said, “My God saved me many generations ago, and he saves me everyday I walk with him, and he will save me every day to come, until I am with him in glory.”
I watched her walk away.
I wondered at her faith.
I’m still wondering about this thing she called hope.